We often face situations that point out, annoy us, are angry. At home, at work, at school, on the street.
And sometimes, sometimes, we lose control several times. We only act, we regret it.
Over the last few months I worked with a 15 year old African American boy. She entered the institution where I was diagnosed with disabling behavior disorder, impulse control disorder and learning disability.
He had no contact with his biological mother and with his father anything.
When my team started working with her, she was physically aggressive for her peers and adults (especially for women), friends with their poor relationships and difficulties.
He was very impatient with frustration and "snapped" very easily, sometimes requiring physical restrictions.
She was sobbing and provoking many, and when she was in daily social interaction, she approached people in a battle position (with her church), even if she wanted to talk to people.
The handling of anger and impulses was almost impossible for him. When she was overturned she burst into tears and fought blindly.
9 months later, he is willing to fight. His "fighting relationship" is no more. When I pointed it out, he was frozen in shock, and a few seconds later he said he did not understand this.
If another client approaches him to fight or steal, he will leave.
Going to his room and staying there. She shakes her hand, sees her strained, fighting to keep her; but does not participate in the fight.
What happened at this time? That it changed so little time?
This was the question to strengthen pro-social behavior and build self-esteem. More importantly, make your ego stronger and more resistant to frustration. She needed it.
Another important thing was to think. Create a copy that was not there to convey stimuli and action.
Sometimes people who have problems with anger management also have bad knowledge, empathy and / or mental function.
There is no switch to stop, think, and act.
The goal here is to create the switch and guide it to any potentially disturbing behavior.
Of course, most of this anger stems from the fact that he is not in contact with his parents and is guilty of guilt … as if he was blaming him.
Another fear. Because of the lack of social skills, any social interaction is a potential stress or threat that gives rise to fear and the response to fear in this case is aggression. They become stressed because they do not know how to deal with these situations.
It is therefore important to create a thinking process that can light up when the situation becomes tense. In order to get that insight into your mind that it will happen at that moment and stop the Stop Sign, where there is no speed limit. In order to think and feel what is happening and why they feel that way. Not easy. The pulse is too strong. But it can be defeated.
If you read this and feel that you have identified this story, I just have one tip: THINK (bold and underlined). Give yourself a moment and think about it. Worthy? Did you win something from action? Why did you react that way? What thoughts came to your mind at this moment? Did he remember something about his past? Do you experience a past and possibly a traumatic situation?
Make sure of constant practice. Think about it and ask yourself the questions you need to ask because it's ok, okay. It's just a matter of searching. And that is a very good way to get started.
Source by sbobet