Sometimes I hear about wives who believe that many marriages problems come from questions of her husband's anger. Often, the husband will jump out very quickly or show extreme anger to his wife or children. Sometimes this anger occurs after events that are very small or irrelevant to other people.
I often hear comments like, "My husband has a serious anger, fine and the next, something annoying him, then suddenly screams, shouts, and whispers, there is no reason to do so.Once later, I'm sorry, but I was crazy in the meantime. Which really has a negative impact on my marriage, I do not want to live with a man who is angry with stupidity, I do not want this life for my children and I find I'm more angry when I do not want to live longer my life. "
I know this is a difficult question, but I think without a bit of work and understanding this is not a question you need to destroy your marriage. In the following article, I propose some methods for dealing with husband's anger issues.
Do not stay or take part. Remove yourself from the situation until you rest. I know it's hard to become angry and defensive. But if you do it yourself and refuse, then things are likely to deteriorate. And often when her husband is in the middle of such a situation, she does not act or rationally thinks. So it is very unlikely that your own anger will change your current action.
In my experience and observation, the best results are often obtained by saying, "I see you are very angry. Experience has told me that if that is the case, nothing will be resolved, I will go and do something else, when it calms down, we can talk about it more, but nothing good will come in and argue with you, and I'll come back with you later. "
You may be following yourself and still be angry, but if you calmly remove yourself from the situation every time, then this will teach him that there is really no reason to act again and again. If you do not stay and will not get the reaction you are looking for, you will have to learn the frustration in other ways and communicate it with you. If you find that you are no longer paid for your wrath, you hope it eventually turns out to stop and find another way. Is this a part of your personality, your education, or is there any stress in your life ?: You can really help if you can figure out why there are such angry problems. Ask yourself if you've always been this way. Look at your family and parents. Do they show their frustration or try to solve their problems? Is this something that has just emerged after a change of stress or circumstances?
The answer to these questions provides some insight into how we handle it best. Some people have been raised in families where anger is a common way for someone to raise awareness or solve the problems. If your husband is due to family history or family culture, this problem is very different than if your husband responds only because of the recent circumstances.
True, you can not get rid of her husband's problems and I'm not expecting it. But if your anger comes from a situation that you can point out or fix, you should look at the causes of anger – even if it only helps to understand and react better to it.
Help your husband learn new ways to express and cope with his anger and frustrations: As I said, you can not handle your problems, but you can try to ease its burden, to care for it and because you can improve your life too.
One of the possible strategies is to try to get her husband to counsel. However, I know that many husbands in this situation refuse to go. Knowing this, do not forget that one thing you can control is your own reactions and responses. And it can also encourage him to find alternative ways to express or solve his problems. If you see that trying to do this, you must make positive confirmation and let him know that you are trying to.
Do you remember when I said that when you get angry you have to remove yourself and check it later? Well, if both of you are calm and anger passed, you can ask him if you have time to discuss things. The idea is to tell him you love her, just to hurt her, if her wrath shadows everything else. And you want to tell her she knows he's hurting too. Make it clear that the goal is to help him. The goal is not to be ashamed, to feel guilty, or to point out how bad a boy is. The goal is to help him figure out why he is so angry and help him either eliminate the source of his anger or learn to deal with her in a way that is healthier for her family.
This is important because anger issues may indicate more serious marriages. I firmly encouraged the woman in the above example to act quickly because she knew this problem would deteriorate on her marriage. Rather than continue to respond more and more furiously to her husband, she needed to be closer to her before any real change occurred.
This may seem like a controversy because no one wants to deal with someone who always betrays them or feels bad. But in order to make change, it is most important to slowly change the dynamics of anger and marriage and begin to rebuild it. Otherwise, repeat the same old rage patterns as long as this does not hurt your marriage, either to the point or does not return.
Source by sbobet